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Showing posts with label Hall of Fame. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hall of Fame. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Scenes from the Hall of Fame Inductions

Friday afternoon...

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. David Robinson.

(crowd applauds)

Oh. My. Gosh. Johnny, is he really wearing jeans right now?


He is definitely wearing jeans. Ugh.

And they are WIDE LEGS. That's so '95.


Well look at his hair. Would it kill him to get some bangs and a sensible side part?


Let's just hope Michael says something to him.

Totes. He will.

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Michael Jordan.
(crowd applauds)
Killer jeans, bro.
I just wanted to thank David Robinson. He knows why. He wore jeans today. Yeah, jeans. Wide leg jeans. That inspired me though. Saturday night, I'm wearing the widest wide leg jeans you can find. Any time I see David Robinson in jeans, I'm going to wear baggier jeans that him. You can count on that.

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Saturday night...

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Michael Jordan.
(crowd applauds)

Oh don’t laugh, don’t laugh. Stylish jeans, like fears, are often just an illusion.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Kanye West Interrupts Michael Jordan's Hall of Fame Speech

You all might not know this, but EA Sports used to put a fake me in its NBA Live games. I played with him once in maybe 1996, and his rating wasn't 99, which kind of upset me. I'm not saying they messed up, but Live 97 had me at a 99.

NAW MAN. WAIT UP YO. THIS AIN'T RIGHT YO. LET'S GET SOMETHING STRAIGHT. I AIN'T SAYING MJ ISN'T GREAT CUZ HE IS, BUT I NEED TO SPEAK ON THIS.

What are you doing? I'm trying to remember every thing anyone ever did to offend me in the slightest, and you're interrupting me.

LOOK MIKE I'M SORRY TO BE TAKING AWAY FROM YOU BECAUSE I THINK YOU'RE GREAT AND I LOVE YOUR GAME. BUT I CAN'T LET PEOPLE SAY YOU THE BEST WHEN ERRYBODY KNOWS HOW GREAT I AM.

This isn't cool, man. You're going to make my list.

WHAT? I PLAYED WITH LEBRON ONCE AND I HAD A TRIPLE DOUBLE. THAT MEANS I AVERAGED A TRIPLE DOUBLE AGAINST THE MVP. YES I DO KEEP TRACK OF MY STATS IN PICKUP GAMES. SO MIKE, YOU'RE GOOD BUT I'M THE BEST. WHY WON'T YOU LET ME BE GREAT? I'M OUT.

I'd like to thank Kanye West for giving me the motivation to release my first rap record. I guarantee that any time I see him near a mic, I'm going at him.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Pat Riley Is A Big Fan of Dean Martin

When the moon hits you eye like a big pizza pie
That's amore
When the world seems to shine like you've had too much wine
That's amore

Bells will ring ting-a-ling-a-ling, ting-a-ling-a-ling
And you'll sing "Vita bella"
Hearts will play tippy-tippy-tay, tippy-tippy-tay
Like a gay tarantella

When the stars make you drool just like a pasta fazool
That's amore

When you dance down the street with a cloud at your feet
You're in love

When you walk down in a dream but you know you're not
Dreaming signore



Scuzza me, but you see, back in old Napoli
That's amore